The memento 纪念物
作者： 来源：易学网 2013-05-15 09:33:06.000
When I found this toy which I had forgotten for a long time, I recall my grandpa.
One day when I was trying to find something unimportant in my room, I came upon a toy which I had long forgotten. I thought maybe I had ignored the toy on purpose because it had meant too much for me, memories of which were so painful and heartbreaking. But deep in my heart I knew that I would never been able to forget it because it had been branded in my mind. I gazed at it, which was in a band suit as clean and lively as it had been before, with cymbals in both hands. It seemed as if it were ready to execute a piece of music at anytime.
It’s a toy my grandpa gave me. When I was a child, I always followed my grandpa wherever he went. Once when we were out, I saw this dog toy walking around striking cymbals. I gazed at it eagerly for a long while, not expecting that my grandpa, who was always unskillful to speak out his love, would buy it for me. I got wild with joy and showed it off in front of my family. I played with it day after day with such enthusiasm that it often ran out of battery. I still remembered my grandpa’s face when he watched me playing with the toy. His smile was shy but proud, as if he was trying to tell everyone it was he who bought me that toy. At that time I didn’t realize that it would be the last toy he gave me for his life.
When he got ill, we thought it wouldn’t be much serious. But his condition was going from bad to worse. He was gradually wasting away with illness, and became thinner and thinner day by day. Finally he had to stay in the intensive care unit in hospital in his last days. I saw him crumpled by illness, unable to speak, his face bathed in tears; he had even wanted to give up his respirator once. His sufferings wrung my heart. As his health was falling all the time, each of us grieved with a wrenched heart.
My grandpa had always worried about his grandsons and granddaughters. He always mumbled who would take care of these children if he passed away till one day he died quietly at the midnight and we were even unable to say goodbye to him. Perhaps he didn’t want us to watch him in agony and chose to leave alone. I have regretted about it till now. How I wish I could have been able to accompany him in his last moment because there were so many things I wanted to tell him. He had promised me that he would come home strong and healthy, but he failed to keep his words and left us without saying a word.
We seldom talked about grandpa since his death as if we had all reached an agreement, but I can’t help missing him as long as something reminds me.
I took out the toy and pressed the button. It began to walk on the ground striking its cymbals as happily as before. The music was lighthearted, but my heart was burdened with sadness. The toy can never bring my grandpa back to me. Grandpa, how are you there in heaven? I miss you so much.